


Hon, meet the kids

by ThatOneGirlBehindYou



Category: The Avengers (2012)
Genre: I Don't Even Know, Loki's Kids, M/M, Tony is a little OOC
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-06
Updated: 2013-01-06
Packaged: 2017-11-23 21:21:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,629
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/626653
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThatOneGirlBehindYou/pseuds/ThatOneGirlBehindYou
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>For some reason, Tony s gotten it into his mind that he should meet Loki s kids. Loki knows better than to try and make the genius forget about the issue. Unfortunately, he also knows better than to introduce anyone to his kids.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Hon, meet the kids

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, dears!
> 
> So it seems all I do while I should be working in In Plain Sight is spawn random plotbunnies... Sorry for that!
> 
> About this... I love Loki´s kids, and, while I´m totally in love with that Hel!Darcy, Fenrir!Coulson, Jôrmungandr!Fury going around, I wanted to try something a little simpler, since it was my first time writing about them.
> 
> So, here it goes.

**Disclaimer:** None of the characters used here are mine.

\--

"So... I´ve been thinking…" Tony cut himself mid-sentence, and took a gulp of scotch. Loki stared at him from across the couch for barely a moment, before his unimpressed gaze returned to the book in his grasp.

"Go on…"

Tony sighed internally. He had been so sure after his conversation with Bruce and now… He took a deep breath, and told himself to man up and just drop it.

"I should meet your kids."

Now **that** got Loki´s attention. The book slipped almost comically off his grip until he caught it, and he focused his too wide eyes back in Tony.

"Come again?"

"… Your kids? I want to meet them?" Tony repeated, a bit unsure after the slight tremor in the god´s voice.

"… Why?"

"Because I´m banging their dad, of course? I thought it´d be nice."

"I… Well, I hadn´t thought of that." Loki swallowed thickly.

"I see." Tony frowned in suspicion. "Would it be ok?"

Loki cleared his throat noisily, and if the way his eyes drifted sideways for a second meant something, it was that he was getting nervous. Which was bad. Because Tony was getting interested.

"Of course it would!" The god finally answered, in such a cheerful voice that it was almost painfully fake. "I… Why don´t you ask Thor for some advice first?"

\--

 

And thus, Tony found himself at the common living room, Thor at the table, Steve at the armchair, where he sketched peacefully, and Bruce sprawled on the loveseat, picking finger food from a plate.

"And he like… Flipped off. Went nuts. In that completely cold, calculator way of him, but I know him, and he freaked out!" Tony declared, a bit proud of himself. After all, it was not a common event.

Thor rubbed his nape, uncomfortable.

"… Why would you ever want to meet my nephews and niece?"

"I… figured it would be a nice gesture?" He pointed to the other scientist on the couch. "Brucie said it would be. What´s wrong with it?"

"My brother´s kids are… sure to leave an impression in you."

"Thor, buddy… I´ve been seeing your brother for over three years now. When this started I never would have thought I´d survive him this long, let alone still be _with_ him! There´s no bigger impression than that one! I guess I ought to meet them."

"My nephews are lovely in their own way, but trust me when I say you would be lucky to live your entire life without meeting any of them. Specially considering you´re bound to meet their sister sooner or later."

"You´re a douche."

Steve raised his eyes from his sketchbook.

"I think you should do it. You´re not getting any younger, and I think I speak for all of us when I say I´m quite proud of what you´ve accomplished with Loki. Sure, he might still get in trouble and more often than not wreck up some chaos just to keep us on edge…" He shuddered, remembering the Blue Monkey Debacle two weeks ago. "But he´s changed. And you´ve changed too, and I think it´s safe to say that one of the signs of you finally becoming a fully functional adult is you wanting to get more involved with both Loki and his family." And he beamed Tony a smile that made him feel as if he´d just gotten a golden star from his teacher in kindergarten.

"See?! Two responsible adults vote in favor of my decision! I win!"

"… May I take back what I said about you being an adult?" Steve muttered with a smile, and Tony waved him off.

"Still, two responsible adults!"

"None of which have met the subjects in question…"

Bruce cleared his throat, staring up at Tony.

"I know I said it would be fine, but have you actually done any research on them? I don´t think it would be intelligent to run into them without being prepared."

"Brucie, baby!" Tony lifted his arms in frustration. "Who do you take me for? Of course I did my research." And he stood up to walk toward the door. "But well, the only stuff I found was weird metaphors about horses and wolves and snakes." He cracked his shoulders loudly. "Ok then, I´m off to convince my little bundle of joy that I do really want to meet his devil spawns."

And he left, leaving behind a silence that quickly turned awkward when Thor sighed.

"… Those aren´t really metaphors, are they?" Bruce asked, without looking.

"When my brother comes here raging because I didn´t dissuade him, I expect you to intercede on my behalf."

\--

 

This is how Tony Stark found himself staring in awe at the gold-plated walls of Asgard´s royal palace, as he followed Loki through a gigantic hallway.

"So, first kiddie lives with your family?"

"…You could say that."

"Great." And he sped up to reach Loki and wrap an arm around his waist. "The baby prince´s first kid… Must have been quite a big deal, huh?"

"Sleipnir was… A scandal, yes." Loki bit his lips.

"Why?" Loki stopped walking so suddenly Tony nearly slipped on the polished floor. "Loks?"

"Please, _please_ tell me you really did research on my children, Tony."

"… Yes?"

"And you were… Fine with it?"

"… You got prego, I got that. I also got that you do that a lot, no big deal, I´ve seen you grow boobs out of sheer willpower, and I´ve known you for far less time than the people here."

Loki stared at him for nearly a full minute, only taking his eyes off him when Tony was about to start fidgeting.

"Thor said you mentioned something you mistook as metaphors… I know I should´ve asked this before but what _exactly_ did you take as such?" He asked, pinching the bridge of his nose.

"Well… You know, the Ragnarok mostly? I just thought it would be too out of character for you to wait so long before going batshit insane on everyone."

"Oh, for Odin´s sake…" And Loki went back through the hallway, back to where they came from, dragging Tony along with him. "Let´s go home already, this was clearly the worst idea you´ve ever had and it was foolish of me to not realize sooner."

"Wait, WAIT." Tony planted his heels in the floor, not caring that he was still being dragged. "Loks what is it?"

"What is it?! You thought the _horse_ was a metaphor!"

"…Horse."

Loki slapped his own forehead with what Tony knew was enough strength to flip a small car. It left a red mark. "Svadilfari, the Builder´s horse. The one I pulled away from his duties at the wall in order to avoid the other gods´ wrath? That horse? Or maybe the son you so insisted on meeting, Sleipnir, King of Horses? Odin´s steed, with the golden hooves that gallop across the branches of the Tree itself?"

"… Shit." Tony could feel the blood running from his face, as it all rained down on him.

He had pulled a good one this time. But really, Thor and Loki had denied so many legends… How could he know the children out of everything else were not only real, but literal as well?

As he looked for words to answer, he noticed how Loki´s face hardened gradually, and his mind sped up again, kicking into emergency protocol and bringing back everything he remembered about the myths. Damn.

He managed to swallow and clear his throat, assuming what he felt as a relaxed, carefree stance.

"Well that´s a new one." And he gestured on the direction they were following before they had broken into discussion. "Where is he, then?"

"… What?"

"You´re not backing off, are you?"

"Stark, you really don´t want to meet my children."

Oh well, it was always a bad sign, to revert back to _`Stark´_.

He pulled out a smirk.

"What is it, Loks? Ashamed of your insanely hot, amazing and successful Midgardian partner? How dare you?" He added in mock offense. "Come on now, I want to be home for dinner, I booked us a table…"

"Stark."

Tony stopped on his tracks, and turned to look at Loki once more.

"I get it. I appreciate it. Now drop it."

And really, Tony should have known better. He should have agreed and apologized and never bring the children topic up again.

But the god´s expression.

The pained resignation was just enough fuel for his stubbornness.

"Are you seriously telling Tony Stark to `drop it´, Sweetcheeks?"

"Yes I am. And Tony Stark should really know when to take advice." Loki warned, his features hardening again. He paid no mind when Tony stepped up closer to him, even snatching his hands from his grip when he held them. "Let´s…"

"Let me meet Sleipnir. Just him, if you want. If you think I can´t take the rest of them, then we go home."

Tony held the piercing green stare for as long as he could, until the god sighed and shook his head.

"Why would you ever…"

"Well, why wouldn´t I?" Tony cut him again, smirking only half-heartedly before leaning up to plant a kiss on the corner of his mouth. "To the stables, then!"

\--

 

"So the kid has his own stable?"

Loki snorted. "You wouldn´t think I´d let Odin put him with the rest of his filthy, hoofed beasts, would you?"

"Well you let him ride him."

"That´s different. Sleipnir agreed to that, even though I can´t begin to understand his motives." And judging by how he frowned and rolled his eyes, said lack of understanding still bugged him. "But my son is not a beast, and he will not live like one."

Tony nodded thoughtfully, while Loki leaded him past the main stables, towards a bigger, way more ornamented one behind them. "Can he speak?"

Loki stopped at the doors and looked over his shoulder to smirk at him. "If he likes you, he just might." And he pushed them open.

The stable was huge and flashy on the inside too, with carved wooden posts and windows made with individual pieces of stained glass. Tony noticed the space was not divided in stalls, instead filled with haystacks, ornamented water containers, and a glorified set of riding gear.

There was one stall only, with tall walls, and a carved door that depicted a rampant stallion in the middle of a great battle. There was, however, no horse in sight.

"Where is he?" Tony whispered, and Loki hushed him. He clicked his tongue softly, before calling out.

"Sleipnir? Are you awake, my child?" He asked, facing the stall. "I have brought a… Visitor."

Silence remained for a second, before a soft, single huff echoed, and the sound of a large body shuffling reached them. First came the sound of a hoof against the floor, then several more, and finally, from behind the walls of the stall peaked the head of the biggest horse Tony had ever seen. He sported gray fur, a black mane, and a pair of green eyes that were definitively Loki´s.

"…How did you even birth him without dying?"

"His father was even bigger. I was just… Proportional." Loki smirked. "Son of a giant´s horse, what did you expect?"

Sleipnir neighed, and Loki turned to face him with one of those wide, naked smiles Tony so rarely saw on him.

"Hello to you too, my dear." With a flick of his wrist the stall´s door swung open, and the horse strode out. Tony stared in amazement at the way the four pairs of legs moved gracefully, one after the other, never touching. "How are you?"

Sleipnir huffed and snuggled his big head on his mother´s shoulder, while he wrapped his arms around his neck.

Tony shuffled awkwardly to the side, not wanting to intrude the moment, but Sleipnir had already noticed him. He took his head off Loki´s shoulder, and motioned to him. Loki sighed and then composed another smile.

"This is Anthony Stark. He happens to have been my partner for quite a time already."

Sleipnir´s ears perched up in interest.

"Yes, he´s a Midgardian. Mortal too, yes."

Tony didn´t know whether to be freaked out or fascinated by this weird telepathy they seemed to have going.

"As I was saying, he expressed interest in meeting you and your siblings… Yes, I told him, but I have come to learn he can be quite stubborn."

Sleipnir then let out a long neigh, nudged at his mother (whose expression had shifted into one of embarrassed annoyance) and if that wasn´t a horse poking fun at a Norse god then Tony didn´t know what was real anymore.

"Yes, even for me. Now go and greet him already." The god slapped Sleipnir´s neck softly as he took a couple of steps behind, leaving his son and his partner in what could only be described as one of the freakiest stare offs in history.

Tony took a moment to contemplate all of Sleipnir´s appearance. The many legs, all long, muscled and deepening in color as the fur reached the hoof. The silky black mane that hung past his neck. The green eyes that had fascinated him in a much different face. He spoke.

"Don´t you ever trip?" And he wanted to kick himself in the face immediately after, because he really meant to say something amongst the lines of _"Hey, this is a pretty neat stable you´re rocking here."_ Or _"Are those horseshoes made of real gold? I could pimp you an armor to go with them."_ Or even something trivial and uninteresting as _"Nice to meet you, Sleipnir."_ Or… Anything!

Sleipnir stared at him for a bit longer. A bit _too_ long.

"You idiot, of course he doesn´t…"

But Loki was cut short by his son taking a step forward Tony, and quickly making a mess of his own legs. The trip sent him on a fall that would most likely have crushed Tony to pieces if not for the fact that he regained balance at the last second, his own face just inches from the mortal.

Tony stared in frozen panic, feeling the blood still escaping his face, and then in amazement, as the equine features right in front of his own boiled down until they became a fully human, smirking face.

"It would seem I do sometimes… How embarrassing… I hope I didn´t scare you too much?"

Yes, Sleipnir looked just like Loki with that fucking expression.

"So you´re a magical pony. Amazing."

Sleipnir laughed amiably, looking at his mother.

"I like this one." He commented, gesturing at Tony with a slender hand that ended in neatly trimmed nails with golden rims. "Is he the same Anthony Stark you threw out the window?"

"Indeed he is."

"So you do speak about me." Tony grinned teasingly.

"Only because it has educational value. You piss me off; you get a free ride down a high hill."

"Or just a free ride, it seems."

"Sleipnir!"

The (not) horse laughed once more, even if he did try pulling on an apologetic expression for his mother´s sake. Tony´s grin grew wider. He certainly liked this guy.

"So… Tell me, are all your brothers like you?" He gestured imprecisely. "You know… Anatomically impossible and the spitting image of your mom?"

Sleipnir smirked and shook his head. "None like the original, I´m afraid. Both my brothers are disappointingly normal, and the only impossible thing about them is their size… It´s my sister you want to keep an eye out for."

"I keep hearing that."

"Good. That means some people care about you." He turned to his mother once more, and asked a question in a language he couldn´t discern, but that he often heard whenever Loki and Thor wanted to discuss something private.

Loki´s answer came in the same language, and Sleipnir smiled once again, if softer this time, before turning to Tony.

"Well, now that you´ve woke me up, I´m afraid I have some errands to run." He started, and held out a hand for him to shake. "It was a pleasure meeting you, Anthony."

"Tony." The man squeezed the other´s hand a little.

"Tony. I hope you and my mother stay happy, you should visit again soon." And there he pulled Tony closer by his shoulders, his face serious if not for the twinkle of amusement in his eyes. "Use your last name when you meet Jôr, please. Do that for me." He whispered, and let go a second after.

He stepped back, and before Tony could ask him what he meant, he had already twisted on himself and turned back to his original form. He allowed his mother to pull the stable´s doors open for him, and strutted out.

"Are all your children… Can they all do that?"

Loki nodded. "Shapeshifting is a genetic trait, and it seems mine´s strong enough to have carried on to all of them." He explained. "My penchant for sorcery, though, is a different matter. Only Hel indulges from time to time."

"Sweet." Tony stuck his hands in the jacket´s pockets, before asking. "So? How did I do? Do I get to meet the rest of them?"

Loki sighed as they left the stable. "I´ll consider it, let´s have lunch."

\--

 

As soon as they had pushed their plates away in the long table, three men approached them to greet Loki with enthusiasm. Tony spared them a look as Loki greeted back in a considerably calmer manner.

A dead-faced one, a big (supersize-me big) one, and a Robin Hood wannabe… So these were the famous Warrior Three.

"Whatever brings you here, Loki? Is Thor in any danger?" The Robin Hood asked with a smile.

"Don´t fret over my motives, Fandral, you know it does you no good." Loki smiled tiredly. "Tony here insisted on meeting my offspring, and I obliged, that´s it."

What followed then was what Tony was starting to catalog as the standard response whenever Loki´s kids were brought up. Both Fatty and Blondie´s eyes widened in surprise and even Frowny arched an eyebrow.

"I´ve heard Thor praise the Midgardian bravery, but this is quite a feat! Do you really intend to meet them?" Fatty asked.

Tony held back a sigh (really, that "Oh god why would you ever want that?" attitude was getting tiresome.) and fixed a smile.

"Yes, of course. In fact, I already met Sleipnir. Charming lad, great sense of humor." That erased the amazement in their faces, turning it into confusion.

"… The… Horse?" Blondie asked, as if to be sure.

"Um… Yes?"

"Great sense of humor? Are you jesting?" Blondie turned to Loki, an offended look in his face. "We can´t even talk about your kids and this Midgardian gets to jest at your firstborn´s expense?!"

Loki rolled his eyes. "There´s a slight difference. Now, if you´ll excuse us, we ought to visit Helheim now." He muttered, rising from the table. "I´ll send your regards to my brother."

Tony smirked at the way he three men paled at the mention of the odd name, and followed Loki after waving them goodbye briefly.

"What was that?" He asked, and Loki smiled.

"Sleipnir doesn´t take his human shape often. It took him years before he was comfortable enough around Thor to show him. Most people do only know him as `The Horse´"

"… Oh."

"Oh indeed, love."

Tony stopped walking for a second, surprised, and then sped to catch up to Loki.

"Petnames, Loks? What´s gotten you into such good mood?"

"Well, it´s not often that I get to visit my daughter with company."

"Right. Hel, wasn´t it?"

"Queen of the Underworld herself."

"King of Horses, Queen of the Underworld… I sense a trend here."

"They _are_ after all, the King and Queen´s first grandchildren." Loki explained, guiding him to the new Bifrost that shone brightly on the distance. "Even though Sleipnir couldn´t afford a real kingdom because of his father´s lack of lineage, and he had to settle for just a title."

Tony patted Loki´s forearm when the taller´s features scowled at the mention of Sleipnir´s father.

"I see. So Hel…?"

"Hel was born from my union with a noble Frost Giantess."

"A Frost… A Jotun? Really? You?" He asked thrice, familiar with the disdain Loki still felt toward his roots. As if to confirm, the god´s features switched to disgust again.

"Angrbôda was in disguise. A good sorceress, she was. She fed us the story that she´d been `adopted´, so to say, into Jotnar royalty. Odin couldn´t have been happier, he got an alliance without having to marry me to another Jotun." He sighed. "With Hel we thought it was only a coincidence. With Jôrmungandr we blamed me and my magic. With Fenrir, we had no choice but to accept we had been played, and that our powers combined had created those strange children. Angrbôda died soon after."

"Died?"

Loki smirked. "Yes. A completely unsuspicious death. I was away on a quest and came back to find my beloved wife had left us… And what a shame it was, for she was quite beautiful, frankly clever and certainly a good company, in spite of all my distaste towards her lineage."

"Remind me to never… Piss you off. Or be Jotun. Or anything."

"You´d do it either way, if you had the chance."

"I…" But Loki squeezed his arm, and Tony closed his mouth. They had arrived to the Bifrost, and a tall, dark and imposing figure awaited them. He felt Loki tense and straighten at his side, and his body unconsciously mimicked him.

"Gatekeeper."

"Prince Loki. Anthony Stark."

"We have need of the bridge´s power."

"You are off to visit your daughter, Silvertongue. Why not use one of your secret paths that have so well served you until now?"

Loki´s mouth twitched, and he gestured at Tony.

"It´d be easy for me to travel, but as I´m sure you know, it is dangerous to follow the paths that lead into Helheim while accompanied by living beings."

The gatekeeper stared at them for a minute too long, as if trying to decipher whether or not Loki had ulterior motives, before turning his back on them and walking into the circular building at the end of the bridge.

"Is he always…"

"Shut up. He can hear you." Loki squeezed Tony´s arm again, before he followed Heimdall´s steps and pulled him along.

The inside of the building was both amazing and puzzling at the same time. Tony found that the runes carved into the plated, metallic walls intrigued him immensely, and the structure as a whole was as foreign to him as… Well… Not many things were foreign to him anymore.

He watched as Heimdall thrust his sword into what seemed to be a control panel of sorts, and twisted it, all in that unnerving silence of his. He prompted them with a golden gloved hand to stand closer to what Loki had once called "the gate", just as Tony heard the building around them start spinning.

Suddenly, there was light, and Tony felt as if someone had gripped his entrails and dragged them forward, bringing him along. For a second everything was darkness, the only feeling he recognized was his arm gripping Loki´s waist, and then not even that. Just when he was starting to think he had died on the way, the sensations hit him all at once.

The scent of humid ground. The light of a thousand candles. A song that reverberated through his very bones, sung by a thousand throats. A taste of copper in his tongue (perhaps he´d bitten himself). And Loki´s waist under his arm.

It took him a moment to settle, and the god held him patiently.

"I´m about to vomit my lungs."

"A common side-effect of first-time trips on the Bifrost. Breathe deeply." He hushed him, and Tony didn´t even have the strength to glare at his condescending attitude.

"Are we there already?"

"Why don´t you tell me?" He answered, prompting Tony to look around.

They were in a forest formed by trees like no other he´d seen before. Or so Tony thought, until he looked up to try and find his location judging by the stars, and found only darkness above.

It took his eyes a while to adapt, but when they did he noticed the space over the tree tops did have an end. It was miles and miles away, but he could see the faint outlines of what looked like roots and rocks. He looked down, and found that the forest was dimly lit by floating candles that painted everything with a blue-ish hue.

"…This is Hell, isn't it?"

"Aw, don´t look so upset… You always knew we´d end down here." Loki smirked.

"Your daughter. Is Queen of Hell. Hel. This should surprise me more than it does."

Loki chuckled and offered him a hand, guiding him through the trees. "It´s not `Hell´ in the conventional way. It´s just… Not Valhalla."

"Valhalla, that´s your Heaven, right?"

"You know? For an atheist, you certainly do let yourself be fooled by religious nonsense." Loki mused. "Valhalla, reigned by the Valkiryes, is the place where one´d go if killed in battle. Hel is for everyone else."

"Oh…" Tony muttered, and Loki squeezed his hand once.

"Yes, the´re probably here."

"Who?" Tony tried for indifference, but the god´s eyes remained on him.

"No one. I´m talking to myself." He cleared his throat. "Hel´s powers are vast and she´s as cunning as I am. Don´t get too close to her."

"Check." Tony stopped for a second, and ripped a loose piece of bark from the three on his right, before thrusting it into his pocket. Bruce would have a field day. "You _can_ get me out of here, can´t you?"

"Of course I can. Getting souls out is easy once you have her permission, but any living thing that dares crossing the frontiers of her land without announcing itself faces certain death. I am the only one that walks the hidden paths to this place."

"Cute. What about her brothers? Do they never visit?"

Loki smiled. "My kids are bound to their place of residence. Were they not, they´d probably be inseparable."

"Really? No hard feelings between brothers and stuff?"

"I know what you allude to, and I don´t like it." Loki half-glared. "My kids love each other. If there´s a rivalry I need to acknowledge, it´d be the one between Sleipnir and Jôr. Though Sleipnir feeds the fire for a good laugh only."

"Sleipnir? How could anyone have problems with Sleipnir? That guy´s amazing!" Tony asked, ignoring the part of his mind that announced him he´d officially identified himself with a horse.

"It´s pretty silly, actually. Jôr used to think he was supposed to be a dragon, and that Sleipnir had stolen his share of limbs."

"… And you didn´t…"

"He was barely a hatchling, and he´s always been quite stubborn." Loki blushed. "They eventually stopped arguing exclusively about the `stolen legs´, but the feeling stuck." He stopped walking. "We´re here."

Tony took another look around, and found that the forest had disappeared. Where there had been damp black earth there was now pristine white marble, and the trees had been replaced with carved, lustrous black pillars.

"… How did we even get...'"

"Every path eventually leads here. It just depends on how welcomed you are." He screened his hands around his mouth. "Darling, there´s someone you should meet."

"Ah, yes… Tony Stark."

The whisper was delivered so close to his ear and with such a low voice that Tony should´ve found it arousing. Instead, the cold breeze that brushed his skin made every hair on his body stand on edge, and he spun on the spot as quickly as he could. He was met by yet another distorted reflection of his lover.

Hel was tall. Maybe even taller than Loki and certainly taller thank him. Her jet black hair had been tied on top of her head with a silken band, and it fell down her back past her waist. She wore a purple hued dress that hugged her figure tightly… And that was when Tony had to reel back, because Hel turned to face him fully, and shit got surreal.

It changed even as he looked at it, and he figured he shouldn´t ask. Maybe it was just the shadow that fell over her right side that made her skin look transparent and her face look like a white-clean skull for a second, before it turned back. Even her form-fitting dress seemed to hang loose from her right side, as her creamy arm showed its bones. Was it an illusion or the truth itself, it made Tony remember that Loki´s daughter inhabited both the world of living and dead at once. Like reflections on waving water, the woman half-smiled at him.

"Have we met?" Let no one say Tony Stark could ever be rendered speechless. Even taking the unnerving timeless stare he got back into account.

"Quite a few times, indeed…" She seemed to float rather than to walk to him, and Tony, who had been expecting to hear the clatter of her naked and bony right foot against the marble, felt his heartbeat race. "I find your ability to squeeze off my grip quite… Enticing."

Tony swallowed, now face to face with the woman. Her hand ghosted barely an inch from his chin, the fingers turning white and bony by the second.

"That´s enough, Hel." Well, he´d never been happier to hear Loki´s voice. Hel pouted, but backed off.

"You´re no fun, dad."

"I have made quite an effort to keep him alive, dear."

"You broke his building with his body."

"Just a window. And he survived."

"That´s exactly my point." And she grabbed his forearm, smiling. "Do you fear death, Tony Stark?" She added in another whisper that brought the scent of crushed pine needles and incense to his nose.

"No, I…" He tried following her as she circled him, but she was nowhere to be seen.

"Because it sure does look like it. And all after you so shamelessly flirted with me back in the day…" Hel´s voice echoed oddly around the room, and he found her to be carelessly perched on a lustrous black throne. "I can be grateful for you, Tony. After all, you´ve served me so well, and I didn´t even have to ask…"

"Sorry. I´ve got stuff I need to do, can´t die right now." Tony walked to the throne.

"Stuff you can pass on. In fact, you and your lovely team seem focused on teasing me."

"I don´t. Tease you, I mean." He muttered, his eyes lost in the curls of her hair that waved around her without any wind. "I just… People. They keep calling me back."

"What people?" Her voice was smooth as velvet, and it wrapped around his mind like smoke.

"Important people…"

"A captive scientist with no family, fate or will? A robot that you kept only out of the goodness in your heart? An aberration created by an envious man that succumbed to his own rage? And those are just a few." Hel pouted condescendingly.

"They were hard to ignore, I´m sure you noticed." He felt his consciousness slip away from him, and tried to use their voices as an anchor.

"I did." She smiled again, beckoning him forward with her not-dead hand. "My father might be good to those who harbor a special place in his heart, but he´s not a good man."

"I know."

"Yet you love him still."

"And the same applies to him."

Hel shook her head. "You are a good man. Let no one tell you otherwise, not even yourself… Perhaps that is what fascinates him about you. That you are so much like him, yet you choose to be good…"

"Perhaps." He answered. He would´ve probably agreed to whatever she said. Somewhere in the back of his head a voice wondered where Loki had gone to.

"My father has brought death upon uncountable men, Tony Stark."

"He has."

"Few have received the privilege of having death called off them by him. Did you also know that?"

"I figured."

"I wouldn´t dare saying you are a lucky mortal. But your life´s twists are incredibly interesting. Just like you." She leaned closer to him, close enough that a few strands of her long hair tickled his cheek. "The man who has cheated Death…"

"I said _enough_ , Hel."

Tony looked up, even dizzier than he´d been when the Bi-frost´s light died. The throne was nowhere to be seen, and the closest Hel was from him was where she still gripped his forearm with her not-dead hand. Loki gripped her shoulder tightly. "Bring him back."

"Back he is, Father."

"What?" When he spoke, his tongue felt like a piece of carpet stuck in his mouth.

"Look at me?" Loki´s voice sounded hesitant, and Tony turned to comply, swinging sideways for a second.

"I´m fine." He forced a smile. Loki´s hand came to rest on his cheek for a second.

"Keep breathing." He ordered for the second time that day, and turned back to Hel. "That wasn´t nice."

"Just two old acquaintances catching up, Father. You needn´t to fear." She smiled and let her father get closer and run a hand through her hair. "Rest assured that you´ll notice when I finally claim him, for it´ll be flashy and pretentious like himself."

"Of that I´m sure, my dear. But forgive me if I don´t wish to discuss that at the moment."

"Understandable." She looked at Tony, and he felt himself freeze again. "I thank you, Tony Stark. Your decision to change markets has given me the chance to spare uncountable innocent souls."

"Shouldn´t you be… Happy to take in more souls?"

"Why would I?" She asked to no one in particular, as her eyes lost focus. "Death breaks families, sometimes forever. Death is painful and hard, for it´s the act of letting go of the most important thing of all. I understand my duty is a need. But I am glad to be held back."

"I… Ok?" So first a complaint about his interrupted servitude and then a thanking? What…

"Now, Father, I must ask you to show yourselves out. I´m waiting for a world leader I´m quite eager to meet."

Loki smirked. "Rip him to shreds, darling."

Hel smiled back. "Goodbye, Father. Good luck, Tony Stark."

Loki kissed the center of her forehead, and Tony waved anxiously, not wasting a second to follow his god. The marble room quickly faded back into a forest, and Tony guessed they were out of earshot.

"What the hell?!"

"She tricked you." Loki answered, and, after noticing the confused look in his lover´s face, added. "When she touched you. As my daughter, Hel is full of magic. As Queen, her power is barely limited. Her right side kills what it comes in contact with. Her left projects illusions so powerful she´s managed to confuse even me a couple of times."

"So everything she said after she touched me…"

"Things she didn´t want me to hear, I guess." He sighed. "But her last words were earnest. Hel despises her position as a bringer of sorrow, even if she´s come to accept her charge as a part of life. My daughter has been toughened by her circumstances, but she´s good at heart."

"I´m sure… Loks?"

"Yes?"

"I love you."

Loki arched an eyebrow. "Right after a trip to hell, Tony? What did she do to you?"

"Put things into perspective." He grinned. "Where to, now?"

"Back to Midgard. Jôr and Fen reside there."

"You see? I told you I´d do it just fine."

"Try for arrogance when you´ve recovered of your encounter with my daughter."

"Shut it."

\--

"So… Gloomy and creepy are recurring themes for your kids, huh?" Tony took his hand off the cave´s wall and wiped the unidentified slime against Loki´s side. "I liked Sleipnir´s crib better."

"Sleipnir is very ´you´, indeed." Surprisingly, Loki paid no mind to the slime dripping off his thigh. "Perhaps you´ll take a liking to Fen too."

"Jôr and Fen. They´re the `larger than life´ guys, right?"

"Banished to Midgard until the day of the very end." Loki nodded. "They have taken it pretty well. Fenrir likes mortals, and Jôr takes great delight in pranking them."

"Sounds lovely."

"Father?"

"Oh God." Tony gave his breathing a second to stabilize before looking behind him. Right at the entrance of the tunnel a young man stood. Nearly as bulky as Sleipnir and just as tall as Hel, this one sported silvery white hair and golden eyes with slit pupils. His skin looked clammy and cold, wet maybe which, according to the legend was most likely true.

"I didn´t expect you today." He moved forward to hug his father.

"It was all very sudden. Hel sends her regards."

"I´ve been dying for a good chat with her." Father and son flashed mirroring smirks for a second. "Who might the mortal be?"

"An acquaintance of mine. My partner."

"Your mate?"

"An archaic term, but yes, I guess." Loki motioned for Tony to step forward, just as the latter remembered Sleipnir´s parting words.

"Stark. Tony Stark. Pleased to meet you."

"Welcome to my home… Ssssstark." He muttered the name with a disgusted expression and Tony suppressed a smile. "Come in, have a drink with me." He walked down the tunnel and Loki and Tony followed.

The rocky tunnel opened into a vast chamber, furnished with exquisite taste and lit by ancient looking chandeliers. At the top of the cave an opening could be seen, and Tony figured it allowed for natural light during the day. Jôr led them to a table and turned to a nearby wooden trunk.

"What will you drink, Misssster Sssstark?"

"Scotch would be amazing, but I´m not exactly picky about beverages."

"Then ssscotch will be."

Loki elbowed him. Hard. Tony gasped for breath.

"What?" He asked as soon as he could speak again.

"Now you´re just doing it on purpose."

I wish I could say I am, you know I´m a scotch man!" He whispered back hurriedly.

"And the name?"

"Spur of the moment?"

"I swear, Stark, you don´t want Jôr to get fed up with you…"

"Are you two all right?" Jôr se the three glasses on the wooden surface and slid them to his guests. "Now tell me, Father. Why did you take your mate to Hel, and why do you bring him to me?" He took a sip of his clear drink, and Tony got a glimpse of two sheathed fangs.

"You see, Anthony and I met on very… Peculiar circumstances, and we´ve been together for a number of Midgardian years already. He asked to meet my children."

Jôr arched a nearly inexistent eyebrow. "And you agreed?"

Loki shrugged. "What can I say. He´s stubborn and persuasive, and there´s not much you can withhold from him."

The snake smiled teasingly. "I know a man like that."

"He must be a great man." The smirk was palpable in Loki´s voice.

"He likesss to think he isss." He turned to Tony. "Missster Sssstark…"

Tony held up a hand to stop him.

"You know what? Too many formalities. You can just call me Tony."

Jôr stared for a second, frowning, before rolling his eyes.

"Wasss this my brother´sss idea?" He questioned. Tony nodded.

"I didn´t know why. Sorry."

Jôrmungandr turned to Loki.

"Father, I ssswear…."

"I will talk to him."

"Thisss isss getting too tiressssome…"

"It´s just a joke."

"He mocksss me!" Jôr exclaimed. "He mocksss me with people I´ve jussst met and you think nothing of it!"

Tony smirked. "Do I smell favorites, Loki?"

The god turned to give him a nasty glare. "That´s a ridiculous idea." He spat, right over Jôr´s voice.

"You sssmell right."

"You can´t possibly think…"

"He´sss met usss once. And he knowsss already." Jôr interrupted him. He pointed at Tony with an amused smile. "Pretty obviousss isssn´t it?"

Tony smiled back. "A bit, yes. You shouldn´t mind your brother. He´s probably just jealous you´ve got your own place and he´s still camping at grandpa´s."

"I highly doubt it. He enjoysss teasssing me." He downed his drink. "Sssleipnir´sss a dumb mule."

"Excuse me?" Loki frowned.

"Well he isss."

"I can assure you, Svâdilfari was no donkey, no matter how well endow…"

"Father!"

"Can we **not** discuss horse dick on the table?!" Tony exclaimed on time with Jôr. Loki smirked.

"I would happily stop if it didn´t prove to be the best way to shut everyone up."

"Charming."

"You know me."

Tony shook his head, a resigned smile on his face, and turned back. "So Jôr, how´s everything under the sea? Found Nessie yet?"

Jôr chuckled. "Sshe´sss the tip of my tail, so I´d sssay that yesss, I´ve found her indeed."

"Oh… So when your dad said you enjoyed pranking humans…"

"You mortalsss were quite cute during your early ssstagesss… I quite fancied the name `Kraken´, even when the represssentations were far from my true appearance."

Tony whistled into his drink.

"I´m having a drink with the Kraken." He sung to himself. Jôr frowned.

"Isss he drunk already?"

Loki rolled his eyes. "He´s a big child." He looked over Tony once. "Figuratively speaking, of course." He added, making his son laugh.

"Hey, we ruled off height and blueness issues!"

"You called me a mischievous smurf bastard last week."

"Ah, but you´re much more mature than me." Tony grinned. "And you _are_ a mischievous smurf bastard."

"Oaf." Loki rolled his eyes, but smiled either way.

They ended staying with Jör for a lot longer than they had with Sleipnir or Hel, because Jör had no impending business to attend. As the afternoon progressed, he presented them with a snack consisting entirely of seafood, and exchanged stories with them. All n all, it had been nearly three hours before Loki finally stood up and excused them, arguing that he wanted to check on Fen before going back home.

Jör led them to the entrance of the cave and hugged his father again. Tony heard Loki´s bones crack, and offered his hand for a shake a little nervously. It wasn´t so bad. He still felt his hand afterwards.

As Loki summoned a small portal behind them, Jór asked.

"How´sss my uncle Thor?"

Loki arched an eyebrow.

"Your fascination with him is becoming morbid, my son."

"Jussst making sssure."

"That you don´t have to kill him anymore, or that you still get to?"

Jör shrugged "Sssometimes I don´t know." He smirked. "Until next time, Father Tony."

\--

 

"Kill Thor?" Before, Loki had transported them to a small, very small (slip and be shark bait small) rock in the middle of the sea, where he´d whispered a word that had made the rock twist and wave before opening in a passage that let them to Jör´s burrow. Now, he´d magicked them straight into a cave so obscenely huge that Tony could´ve swore it could´ve fit the whole Tower snuggly.

"Ragnarok. That tiny little detail you took to be a metaphor?"

"You´re never letting me live that own, right?" He sighed. "So it´s all real? Marry another chick, get two other kids, get them killed, and proceed to kill the universe?"

Loki sighed too.

"We gods are… Not immortal, I´m sure you´ve noticed. But we are endless, as time itself is." He started. "There´s a god that has woken up abruptly, blinking us all off existence. A fallen angel has brought his horsemen down on earth. I have fought Heimdall to our death countless times, while everything falls dead around us." He made a pause that he used to look a Tony with eyes that seemed tired. It was at times like this that Tony remembered how old Loki really was. "And every time, it starts again. An almighty being creates the world in seven days. The same deity falls asleep while floating amongst the soft waves of the sea, and dreams of humanity. Zeus kills his father and frees his brothers, and together they mold the earth. The gods model humans out of corn and clay. A cow falls asleep on the ice and giants spawn from the spilled milk. It´s a circle."

"Must be boring."

Loki smiled a little. "One could think so. But every time, there´s a little something that´s just not right. Everything´s changing, slowly but surely. Maybe the time will come in which I don´t have to end it all."

"What changed this time?"

"Many things at once, and for such an abrupt incident I find myself hopeful."

"So mysterious…. Tell me."

Loki swallowed. "Thor was banished to Midgard. And I followed after finding out of my real lineage."

Silence engulfed the cave

"So I´m a change?"

The god turned again, smirking.

"Tiny one, the flutter of a dust speck."

Tony grinned. "The fate of the world depends on me having you so busy you don´t have time to fuck Odin´s shit up. I´m amazing." He concluded.

"Keep thinking that."

"Oh, you know I will." Tony reached up to kiss the god´s lips. He deepened the kiss soon enough, and let himself get so involved he didn´t hear the dry thud of the paws behind hi, until a wet, cold, huge _thing_ pushed him to the ground. A nose.

"Great dad, a treat!"

Tony stared at the gigantic white fangs (long as his leg) that shook so close to his face. When he finally did, Loki spoke far too calmly for his comfort.

"Not this one, Fen."

"…Damn." A red tongue darted across the teeth once, and the beast retreated.

"You better." Loki helped tony to his feet.

"Did Jör…"

"Receive the same warning? He didn´t need to, he acted responsibly enough. You´d do well to emulate your brother."

The wolf sat on his hind les and let the front ones slip across the rock until his chest rested on the ground.

"Meh… I expect you brought a real treat, after this deception."

Loki looked sideways at Tony.

"Maybe next time."

Tony had never thought a wolf could grin before, but well… That was a grin.

"Am I dreaming? Has the God of Mischief been tamed at last?" Claws clattered against the rock when Fenrir stood up again, and his cheery golden eyes darted between them. "Now, who might the victor be?" He held still for a second, while his fur and boy shifted and shrunk.

When he finished changing, the result was a little younger in appearance than Jör. He was noticeably shorter than the rest of his brothers, but his crazed grayish black mane spiked in every direction and added to his height. The golden eyes were the same, deep ad feral. Fenrir leaned into his personal space and sniffed.

"…Smells expensive, good choice dad. Little mortal, you don´t smell scared. Do you not fear Fenrir the Godkiller?" He asked, amused.

"I live with a woman that might or might not have tricked your father and killed a numerous amount of people with her thighs. Being scared is one of the very few things I can´t afford."

"A woman that tricked… Do you live with my mother, by any chance?"

"For the last time, your mother did not trick me." Loki warned through an eyeroll.

"Right. I had forgotten about your undying love for Jotun women." Fenrir smirked. "How did you mange to fall into Anthony Stark´s bed, dad?"

Tony blinked once. "Do I know you?"

"No, but I know you" Fenrir grinned. "Neat tower. Cool toys. Nasty heart condition. Iron man."

Loki smirked. "If you know him, you´ll know falling into his bed was at hard at all."

"But how about staying there? Are you the reason Mr. Stark here´s been out of the romantic spotlight for a while now?"

"Wait a second." Tony made a `time-out´ gesture. "Why does your son know my dating records?"

"Well, it´s hard to read a magazine to the end without you appearing at some point." The wolf shrugged. "That, and your tech is quite good."

"…You´re kidding."

Loki chuckled "I told you he liked humans."

"Yes, no that he read heart magazines and played with StarkPads"" That said, he stepped forward and wrapped an arm around Fenrir´s broad shoulders. "I think you and I will get along just fine." He said.

The wolf grinned back, and proceeded to lead him deeper into the cave.

Whether or not he found a fairly well equipped computer, promised to send some upgrades, and was then invited to watch Star Wars in a cozy home theater is a story for another time.

\--

 

They might have walked in at nearly three a.m. after their dinner, but Thor was sill waiting for them in the common room, and Tony had to admit he was expecting it.

"How did everything go, friend? Brother?" The god asked.

"They behaved. All five of them." Loki answered. "Maybe he was right, and we were overreacting."

"I'm always right, sweetcheeks." He patted Loki´s butt in his way to the bar, happily buzzed and hoping for one last scotch. "They´re just fine. I´d say Hel should meet Natasha if it wouldn´t probably be counterproductive for me."

He should´ve noticed how Thor´s smile turned mischievous just as he took a swig of his glass.

"I underestimated you, Anthony. You might even be a worthy father for the child my brother carries for you."

Tony choked on his drink, and turned to Loki, who watched him with a half terrified, half hopeful, expectant look.

The glass clanked on the floor when it hit a second before his holder did, and Loki´s face turned to an amused smile.

"That was pretty mean, Thor."

"One can´t live wan eternity with you without picking up some nasty habits, brother." He waved as he left.

Loki carried Tony to the couch, and let him sprawled there, as he refilled the glass for himself. He set to watch the human, waiting for him to come back to his senses. Who knew? One day, he might just be worthy, he thought, letting a quite smile spread across his face. With so many things changing, he was allowed to have a bit of hope.


End file.
